Game of Thrones season six premieres tomorrow night, which is not a thing I can pretend to care about. The whole medieval fantasy genre just doesn’t do it for me, and the “Is Jon Snow Dead” drama is stress that I don’t need in my life. However, I will enthusiastically take this opportunity to share with you, dear readers, the most important thing to happen to dragons in the history of the Internet. I’m talking about dragons getting laid—or, more specifically, dragons fucking cars.
Too often, reddit is a cesspool of “well, actually” dudes telling awful jokes and espousing awful positions. But it’s also blessed us with the wonderfully bizarre subreddit that doesn’t mince words: r/DragonsFuckingCars. The 4-year-old sub is home to 14,548 people celebrating and creating artistic renditions of mythical, fire-breathing reptiles fornicating with automobiles. It has practitioners of various mediums and various skill levels united by a common cause. You, too, can join them, as there’s no barrier of entry. Look how easy it is. I just drew this:
I totally forgot wings, but that’s ok. I’m learning!
You may be asking yourself why this subreddit exists, and if you ask that question on reddit you’ll be hit with the obvious: “This is a subreddit for the discussion and appreciation of artwork involving dragons and automobiles.” But really, it’s just an extension of Rule 34. If it exists, there is porn of it. The creator of r/DragonsFuckingCars, u/user812, outlined his thought process in a brief, tragically undertrafficked AMA:
- “What is an exception to rule 34?”
- Someone responds. “Dragons having sex with cars.”
- Create sub.
- “What’s the weirdest sub you’ve ever seen?”
- Someone responds. “r/DragonsFuckingCars.”
- Free advertising all over Reddit.
The more pressing question is why would a dragon be driven (no pun intended) to have relations with a car? Are dragons so sparse in this hypothetical world that they can’t find each other to engage in same-species coitus? Are dragons unable to jerk off? Are cars more sexually enticing than we realize? Like, how bangable is a little red Corvette? Was Prince woke on car banging?
But enough philosophizing. Let’s get to the real meat of the issue and look at more dragons putting their meat in cars. Here’s a digital rendering of a man hanging on to his car while it gets it on with a dragon. Is he upset that his car is boning someone other than him? Probably. Should he let go and move on with his life? Definitely.